August 2nd, 2009
Dear People Whom God Loves,
SPIRITUAL JOURNEY IV
I continue with one more example of the need we have to undergo con version of the “good” things we do.
Let us suppose that we are honest. We don’t lie, cheat, or steal. These are obviously good and important virtues to practice. We might certainly question how these can need conversion.
Suppose that I am honest because I want people to trust me and that will benefit me in the long run. That is not a bad motive. If we look more deeply, we will see that we are not honest because that is good but because it benefits me in the long run. It is still self-centered motivation. This can be very helpful along the way. We should not discount its value. Indeed, I don’t think that we should try to start our spiritual journey with the conversion of the “good” things. This is a conversion that can take place much farther down the road.
However, I think that at some point it is valuable to become aware of how deeply selfish motives are embedded in our humanity. In fact, I think that this selfishness is valuable. At the same time, we must look at its shadow side.
If we don’t ever look at this shadow, we will think of ourselves as superior to others, as more deserving than others, and so on. My experience is that these motivations never fully go away. I find that very valuable because that knowledge helps to keep my pride and arrogance in check. It keeps that pride and arrogance from resulting in behavior that is harmful to others and myself.
Without that check, we can think of ourselves as very good and still be mean and oppressive of people.
The spiritual journey is something like peeling an onion. As you peel away one layer, there is always another that is very much the same.
This realization can help us not to take credit for our progress (this does seem strange because we have to cooperate in the process) but just be grateful. At some point, it seems to me that our cooperation is seen as only by the grace of God.
Smile, God Loves You,
Father Clay
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